How to buy condoms discreetly

Every sexually active person has been in the awkward situation of buying condoms in their local drugstore. Here's how to do it without getting stage-fright.
Steps
Figure out what type of condom you are going to purchase before beginning your mission. don't be shy in preparing yourself before going to the store.
Approach the store nonchalantly, perhaps in a group of friends. Be casual and act as if it is regular and not out of place for you to be buying a condom. Have your research finished before you get into the store.
Walk discreetly up to the condom shelves. Grab what you are looking for and walk calmly to the checkout counter.
While not necessary, you might feel more comfortable if you buy a few more things so you are not standing at the counter with nothing but a box of condoms.
Tie a knot aruond the top of the bag with the handles so if you drop the bag the contents won't go flying out.
Tips
Stores with self-checkout systems are handy to use to buy condoms discreetly.
Thanks to the fantastic age we live in, you can now buy condoms online, and not have to go through this whole ordeal, if you should so choose to do so. The advantages to taking this route is that generally you have more choice, can browse without feeling antsy, and online stores can have much better prices than the local convenience store.
Store the condoms in a cool, dry place, not in a wallet!
You can get condoms at teen clinics for free.
Size is something some people need to worry about. Sure condoms can stretch over an entire arm, but it can still be uncomfortable and even hurt in the wrong place at the wrong time. Think about it.
It may be helpful to take a few minutes to ask yourself why you are so nervous. While many personal purchases can be a little blush-worthy, no one should be ashamed of taking care of themselves. Are you worried that you seem too young? If you are getting into something that you are not ready for, then don't. Are you worried about your parents or friends seeing you? Why? Do a little soul searching to see if these fears hold any water. If there is a legitimate reason for shame, then maybe you shouldnt be buying them. If there is no legitimate reason for shame, then why the discomfort? Someone who is mature enough to have sex really needs to be mature enough to take whatever steps are necessary to care for their health.
Extra ribbing sometimes doesn't do much at all. Don't let marketing hype sell you on something thats a cheap plastic, and feels like saran wrap. Try several different varieties until you find one that fits and works well.
If you're mature enough to have sex, then you are mature enough to get an STD or pregnant. Teens are the highest demographic on both. If you can't handle being pressured to get an abortion, or you can't handle an incurable disease and a 10 year lifespan then make sure you see the documentation for your partner being tested before you start exchanging bodily fluids. The only 100% guaranteed protection is abstinence.
Warnings
Make sure to use the right lubricants - water-based, not oil-based, or they can damage the condom.
Don't brag to your girlfriend/boyfriend that you have a box of condoms, it seems incredibly pathetic.
Make sure not to buy flavored condoms for vaginal or anal sex. They can cause irritation and the powder tends to spread, and you smell weird for days afterwards.
Normal intercourse with normal condoms still smells strange.
Many condoms are coated with a spermicide called nonoxynol-9. It increases the efficacy of birth control, but also tends to cause yeast infections. Be aware of this if you start to experience discomfort - you may need to switch to a brand without the chemical.
Some stores keep their condoms behind a counter. Go for the right reason. If you are a paranoid teen worrying about his first condom purchase, go to where you can feel comfortable. If you are a married adult, and you are managing pregnancy and will be for a while, don't be afraid to go to where you can buy a larger box.
Make sure to check the "best before" date before you buy and/or use the condoms.
If you live in a small town where EVERYone knows your parents, get your friends to buy them for you. :)
Things You'll Need
Bravery or at least a well developed sense of responsibility.
Good Research
An eager, communicating, and reliable sexual partner
Money to buy the codoms